Peru Shenanigans

Hola amigos!

I've been in Peru for almost a month now. It's had it's ups and downs. As per usual, I opt for list-format:

MAIN CHARACTERS
Renato - boss
Carmen - Renato's asst - second-in-command
Pilar - housemate/co-worker

DOWNS
- I'm living in the Hamilton, ON of Peru. Between my house and work is a short, dusty highway littered with factories, unfinished and degenerate buildings, vultures, and ...litter.
- My spanish sucks. I sound like Tarzan a lot of the time.
- It's hard to make friends when you sound like Tarzan.
- I have nothing to do at work, despite offering several proposals for potential projects.
- Between the underdeveloped social life and being idle at work - I'm going crazy.

UP:
- I can still recognize the hilarity of my situation.

FUNNY STORIES

1. Work-related:

a) A week after my arrival, the four people at my office presented me with a "Welcome Workshop". Apart from the expected introduction to their roles/responsibilities and the mandate of the organization, we were each required to share our happiest and saddest experiences in life, our hopes and fears, and then go around and decide who has the prettiest smile/hair, etc. Somehow I don't think this would fly in Canada. Oh well, I won prettiest eyes!

b) [Context: I've been living with Pilar and her family. But I'm moving to my own apartment this week, as I'd always planned. My co-workers are very impressed with my inclination toward independence. Also: COPEME's office is one tiny room (2 desks for 5 people) that they rent from one of their member NGOs (IDESI).]
One day, Renato brought up a great idea. "COPEME needs to follow Amy's example, and become more independent! We need more office space, and we need to end our dependence on IDESI. So Amy, how about this: we will move the office into your new apartment, and then you'll only have to pay half the rent! What do you think?!" I was so shocked that he would even suggest moving the office into my apartment, that I was like, "uh...great idea?" Uh-oh. Later, Pilar brought it up with me so I shared my doubts and told her that I wanted to re-open the discussion with Renato. But I think she did my dirty work for me and told Renato. The next day, Renato opened the discussion: "Amy. We changed our mind. Your apartment is on the fourth floor - that's too high. We prefer second floor office space. So nevermind, we don't want your apartment." Problem solved.

c) A couple days ago, Carmen presented me with a proposal: she wants to pay me to make lunch for her everyday. Even though she can buy a two course meal and fresh juice down the street for $1.50. Huh?? I told her I don't cook at lunch, but if she really wants, she can try eating my sandwiches for a week and see if she wants to keep going. I don't think she'll like it. I'm just going to make PB & J sandwiches ALL WEEK LONG.

2) Went to a business fair at the university with some beekeepers one day. A student gave me a book of poetry he'd written, entitled "Lagrimas Rotas" - translates to "Broken Tears". Emo kids are taking over the world.

3) Found out what propoleo is (a mystery apiculture product - marketed by beekeepers). Comes in a eyedropper bottle and apparently treats anorexia, anemia, diabetes, herpes, and MORE! Still mysterious. I'm taking orders - $3 per bottle.

4) Accidentally ate either cow udder or tongue. Either way... GROSS!

5) Ate honey straight from the comb. Delicious. Still have yet to try the mangos.

6) On tuesday I'm going to facilitate a Business Game for Renato's Administration students at the university. Look at me! I have a history degree and I'm helping teach a business class! And half the kids are older than me! So backwards. I also have BUSINESS CARDS. They look very professional and say I'm an "Asesor en D.E.L." - aka - "Community Economic Development (CED) Assessor". LIES! LIES!

7) People hear have oddly varied taste in American(/Canadian) music. Bryan Adams is HUGE. I met someone who went to a Whitesnake concert. Carmen doesn't speak english, but knows all the words to "Beautiful" by James Blunt (can't even escape JB in Peru).

8) About 3 groups of adolescents per day will shout "Hello!" to me, then laugh hysterically because they made a funny. Isn't english hilarious?

FAVOURITE ANECDOTE: Went out dancing with Pilar and some of her friends to the discoteca one night. I was trying to figure out the group dynamic, and decided that Lucy and Mario were dating, because they were holding hands all the time and dancing very closely (some might call it 'dirty'), and at one point, Lucy was running her fingers through Mario's hair WHILE they were dancing. Definitely seemed like lovers. But then Lucy got equally touchy with their other friend, Nayo. Hmm... That mixed things up. THEN I found out that all three are COUSINS! For real.

Peruvians are weird.

What have you been up to? Do tell! I have lots of time to read emails at work. When I get to use one of the desks.

Much love,
Amy